Elementary – Driving School

2 02 2012

They say that if you can drive in the Philippines, you can drive anywhere. But this innate talent of driving has to come from somewhere right? Of course! And all roads lead back to driving school which is what Mickey and Cris will discuss in 2012′s first Kalyespeak episode.

A: Marunong ka ba magmaneho?
B: Opo!
A: Sige, ano yang hawak mo?
B: Cambio po.
A: Sira! Manibela yan!

A: Do you know how to drive?
B: Yes!
A: Ok, so what’s that thing your holding?
B: The gear stick.
A: Crazy! That’s the steering wheel!

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Categories : Elementary

Elementary – Gutom! Sisig!

26 11 2011

After a long wait, we’re back with, yes, you guessed it, another food-related lesson! Cris, Jov, and Mickey tackle a classic Pampangueno dish: sisig – a staple for almost every Filipino who drinks beer or hangs out in a grill. It’s delicious. It’s succulent. It’s pig’s head. And it’s making us hungry.

A: Gutom na ako!
B: Maghintay ka muna!
A: Bakit ang tagal?
B: Hindi pa luto yung sisig!
A: AAARGH! GUTOM NA AKO!

A:I’m hungry!!!
B: Just wait a while!
A: What’s taking so long?
B: The sisig isn’t cooked yet!
A: ARGH! I’M HUNGRY!

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Categories : Elementary

Pika-pika! – Bahala Na Si Batman

2 08 2011

Caught in a pickle? Bite off more than you can chew? Crap hit the fan? Thinking of eating that balut? In love with Katy Perry but you’re not Russell Brand? Well, if you don’t know what to do, then listen in!  Cris and Mickey talk about this odd, yet interesting, Filipino expression!

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Categories : Pika-Pika!

Elementary – Joke Time!

19 07 2011

Is there a better way than to start your day with a joke? Of course! That’s by saying a joke in Filipino! In this (long-awaited!) installment of Kalyespeak, Cris and Mickey share a classic Filipino joke, while Jovitt gets off his pison and shares some insights on Filipino jokes.

A: May joke ako! Anong tawag sa taong nasagasaan ng pison?
B:  Ano?
A: Tanga!

A: I have a joke! What do you call a person who gets run over by a steam roller?
B: What?
A: Stupid!

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Categories : Elementary

Newbs-Friendship at its Finest

21 04 2011

Ever had those days when you just felt downright ugly? Yeah? Then this lesson is for you! Learn how to be honest with yourself with this lesson hosted by Cris and Mickey! The intricacies and nuances of the Filipino culture is discussed by Bernice, Razi, and Jovitt!

A: Ang panget ko talaga.
B: Hindi ka panget
A: Salamat. Ang bait mo talaga.
B: Hindi ka lang gwapo.

A: I’m so ugly!
B: You’re not ugly.
A: Thanks, you’re so kind.
B: You’re just not handsome.


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Music: Ako si Superman by Handog


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Try Mo Try Ko! – Breaking Up

7 02 2011

Lessons too basic for you? Well, here’s a good way to test your Filipino listening and comprehension skills! Listen in as Razi and Cris introduce Kalyespeak’s newest series “Try Mo, Try ko!”

Leave your answers to the questions in the comments section! Who knows, you might even get a shout-out for being the first to answer correctly! :)

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Categories : Try Mo Try Ko!

Elementary – Street Food Series: Fishballs!

11 01 2011

We are back! And what better way to usher in 2011 than with a lesson on food! Cris and Mickey talk about this uber-famous Filipino street food, fishballs! Paulo and Jovitt explain how and where to buy these yummy balls-on-a-stick, and guest Bernice also shares her two centavos! Listen now, and don’t forget to listen until the end for a musical treat by Cris!

A: Wow Fishballs! Ano yung masarap na sawsawan?
B: May matamis, may maanghang. Depende na sa iyo yan!
A: Sige, yung matamis na lang!

A: Wow Fishballs! What’s a good sauce?
B: There’s some sweet sauce, there’s some spicy. It all depends on you!
A: Ok, i’ll just get the sweet one then!

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Music: Slip by Kjwan (woohoo!)

Image Credit: (source)


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Categories : Elementary

Newbs-Thief! Saklolo!

12 08 2010

You’re walking down the street, and next thing you know it, a guy comes running from behind you, snatches your wallet and runs off to the horizon. What are you to do? Shout “Saklolo!” of course! Listen in as the Kspeak Crew talks about this perilously termed Filipino word!

A: Saklolo! Magnanakaw! Saklolo!
B: Saan siya pumunta?!
A: Doon banda!
B: Ako bahala!

A: Help! Thief! Help!
B: Where’d he go?
A: Over there!
B: I’ll handle it!


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Music: No Touch by Rocksteddy


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Elementary-Do You Want to Talk? May Problema Ako.

19 07 2010

We’ve all had our fair share of ups and downs. That’s just how life goes. And we all know we couldn’t have made it without the help of our friends. This episode shows exactly the opposite of those times. Listen in as Mickey and Jov eavesdrop on a heart-to-heart talk of two “friends.” Razi and Paulo join in and talk about the Filipino cultural phenomenon known as “utang ng loob.”

A: May problema ako.
B: Gusto mo bang pag-usapan?
A: May pinatay ako.
B: Ah.. sige… una na ako.

A: I have a problem.
B: Do you want to talk about it?
A: I killed someone.
B: Oh… all right… I have to go…

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Music: Hanggang Magdamag by Mayonaisse
Photo from Corbis (we don’t own it!)


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Categories : Elementary

Newbs – Street Food Series: Taho!

5 07 2010

Is it a drink or a snack? When it comes to taho, who cares?! It’s cheap and good, that’s all that matters! In this lesson from the Street Food Series, Mickey and Jov talk about the hot and sweet concoction that is taho. Raz and Paulo chime in and explain what it’s made of.

A: Taho! Taho!
B: Manong, magkano po isang baso?
A: P10 yung maliit. P15 yung malaki.
B: Isang maliit po. Padamihan po ng sago.

A: Taho! Taho!
B: Sir, how much is a glass?
A: P10 for the small one, P15 for the larger one.
B: One small one please. And please put a lot of sago.

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Song: Handog by Join the Club


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Categories : Newbies

Newbs – Street Food Series: This is Delicious! Balut!

21 06 2010


People say Filipinos eat anything. And, honestly, maybe we do. In the pilot lesson of the new Street Food Series, the Kalyespeak crew will peel away the shell of everyone’s favorite egg – Balut. What is it? Is it good? Is that a feather?! Find out the answers here!

A: Ang sarap nito!
B: Ano ba iyan?
A: Balut!
B: Wow! Pahingi!

A: This is delicious!
B: What is that?
A: Balut!
B: Wow! Give me some!

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Music: Healing by Julianne

Picture thanks to Corbis.


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Categories : Newbies

Elementary – Where Does It Hurt? Sa Puso.

7 06 2010

We head to the doctor’s office today, but as we shall find out, the hurt of this patient needs more than just medical care. It’s a hurt that’s deep, and it does not scar – and that’s the worst hurt that one can get. Mickey and Jovitt tackle the language. They’re joined in by Razi and Paulo who will introduce us to different body parts and how to say them in Filipino.

A: Saan masakit? Sa ulo ba? Sa tiyan?
B: Hindi po, doc. Sa puso.
A: Heart attack iyan!
B: Hindi po. Heartbreak.

A: Where does it hurt? In your head? Your stomach?
B: No, doctor. It’s my heart.
A: That’s a heart attack!
B: No, it’s heartbreak.

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Music: Rock Baby Rock by Kala

Photo from Corbis


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Categories : Elementary

Newbs-WIFI? Libre!

17 05 2010

Ever go to a coffee shop and feel the need to go online (to listen to the newest episode of kalyespeak, yeh?)?! Well, here’s just the lesson for you! Whether you call it wifi or wee-fee, we all need it, so here’s how to say it! Join Mickey, Jovitt and Razi as they talk about the language, free wifi and coffee shops

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A: May WIFI ba dito?
B: Siyempre.
A: Ano yung password?
B: Hindi kailangan. Libre eh.

A: Is there WIFI here?
B: Of course!
A: What’s the password?
B: You don’t need it because it’s free!

PDF can be found… HERE!

Music: Bonggahan by 6CycleMind
Photo from Corbis.


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Categories : Newbies

Elementary – Why Doesn’t She Love Me? Loser Ka Eh.

3 05 2010


We all get down because of that elusive and slippery four-letter word we call “love.” Why doesn’t he care, why doesn’t she love me, what’s wrong with me? These are the questions we are usually faced with. And, sadly, the answers are often too hard to swallow. Listen in as a heartbroken gent receives the ugly truth from his friend. Jovitt and Mickey handle the teaching, while Razi comes in with his two cents on love and the world of emo.

A: Bakit hindi niya ako mahal?
B: Loser ka eh.
A: Bakit ka ganyan?
B: Emo ka eh.

A: Why doesn’t she love me?
B: Coz you’re a loser.
A: Why are you like that?
B: Coz you’re emo.

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Music: Kailan by The Eraserheads


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Categories : Elementary

Elementary – Who Are You Voting For? Yung Pinaka…

12 04 2010

Colorful and tacky posters, annoying jingles, fake smiles and insincere handshakes – it’s that time again in the Philippines – National Elections! Listen in as Jov and Mickey talk about the upcoming May 2010 National Elections as they teach some helpful election-related language! So, who are you voting for?

A: Sino iboboto mo?
B: Yung pinakamatalino. Ikaw?
A: Yung pinakamasipag.

A: Who are you voting for?
B: The smartest one. You?
A: The most hardworking one.

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Music: Hari ng Sablay by Sugarfree

Photo credit to the owner of this blog.


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Categories : Elementary

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